How to say no to a drink

Way 38 of 50Practise saying no

"No" is a useful word, and not just for drinks. While you're changing your drinking, you need to look after yourself, so don't take on more than you can manage.

Practise saying it. Decide your answer before you arrive, so you're not caught off guard. You don't owe anyone a reason, and you don't have to tell people you have a problem with alcohol. Short and friendly works best:

• "No thanks, I'm not drinking tonight."
• "I'm driving."
• "I've got an early start."
• "I'm taking a break from it. Feeling much better for it."
• "Just a lime and soda for me, thanks."

Get a soft drink in your hand early, and people are much less likely to offer. If someone keeps pushing, that says more about their drinking than yours. You might need to spend less time with them for a while, until your "no" is more confident.

Try this todayChoose the line you'll use, and say it out loud three times before your next social event.

Way 49 of 50Don't fear being boring

Lots of people worry that without a drink they'll be dull, or bored, or that nights out won't be fun. Plenty of musicians, athletes, comedians and adventurers don't drink at all, and nobody calls them boring.

Got a rebellious streak?

If drinking has been part of how you rebel or let off steam, find another outlet for that side of you. Make something outrageous. Join a band. Go to gigs. Take up something daring. It doesn't matter how old you are.

Social nerves

Many people drink to calm their nerves before a party, a date or a work do: "Dutch courage". The only way to get used to socialising sober is to do it. The first few times will feel strange. It gets easier each time.

• You're the same person, with the same personality, without a drink in your hand.
• Most people feel nervous at social events. You just notice it less when you're drunk.
• Shyness isn't unattractive. Loud and drunk often is.
• You're much less likely to say or do something you'll regret.